It hasn't ended. My nasty parent is at it again. It's causing me a great deal of stress right now.
Since that sudden decline, her daughter is back to getting perfect scores on her daily work. She is clearly being more careful again.
I passed back work again and made sure the student took home her folder to show mom. One of the new grades was a quiz. The child got two wrong, scoring an 88.
Her mother had her redo it.
The next day before the student even entered my classroom. she held the paper up asking, "Is this right?" I told her I wasn't going to look at it then.
I'm not sure who emailed who first, but I emailed her mother reminding her of the policy I explained to her in April: I don't regrade work unless I make arrangements with the child. I also described how her daughter had approached me, which wasn't to ask for extra help. I also refused to send the folder home again.
The mother sent me an email stating that I'd proven to her that I wouldn't help her daughter, and that she would seek help elsewhere.
She came in after school looking for me and asked for a copy of the quiz. I sent it home the next day.
I found out Wednesday that she complained to the principal again. I kenew she would. He didn't share what he said, but told me he wasn't planning to do anything this late in the year.
Yesterday, the executive director came to speak with me. The mother sent him a letter asking that her daughter not be in my class next year because I refused to help her daughter.
Of course I had already made sure that her daughter wouldn't be in my class.
Still, I'm upset that it has gone this far and I'm worried that her mom will use her smooth talking with him. I did send him a written report of all of our interactions (though I realized this morning that I left a few things out), but I'm afraid he will only see the bit of recent stubbornness on my part.
I just couldn't let this mother bully me. I know she had her daughter redo the quiz just because I'd told her that I don't regrade work and then she could say I refused to help. When I told her that I generally don't regrade work the first time she had her daughter redo work, she told me I was refusing to help and that I didn't care about her daughter. She tried to say the same at our meeting, but couldn't because I did stay after with her daughter.
If I went over every question for every kid who didn't score 100, I would never teach. I told the executive director that though I realized that it was only one question and wouldn't take much time, I felt like the mother was purposely testing my policy. I also admitted that I did tell the mother that I wasn't concerned about two questions because the daughter had done so well.
I'm a wreck over this. I'm trying not to let it bother me, but I'm barely holding it together.
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3 comments:
It just really sucks when it's the parents that drive good teachers to burn out. Hope the principal can see this woman is a nutjob. Sheesh.
Oh I'm so sorry this is happening to you! I only ever taught college students so thankfully I didn't have to deal too much with parents, although the kids were "independent" for the first time and sure liked testing it out on me. I was IN classes with students that had families like that though and it's just ridiculous. Try to focus on the students that DO adhere to your policies and thrive under them. You're there to teach all the kids, not just the one with the overactive Mom. ((((hugs))))
How absolutely frustrating this must have been! Sounds like you've handled this so professionally. Hang in there!
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