I need to look back on how far I've come.
Five years ago: I was still getting over the oss of my daughter and was a month into my current job. I was terrified about getting fired (after the trauma of my previous job). The kids and staff were awful to me. My lessons were full of creativity and passion. I had an awesome classroom even though it was really just a sectioned off corner of the cafeteria. I was living with my best friend, but things weren't so great.
Four years ago: I was painting and doing floors in the apartment my then fiance's dad built for us. I was already getting the signs that things weren't going to work out. My fiance had quit his job shortly after our engagement and usually spent half the day sleeping while his dad and I worked on the apartment. I was exhausted from working so hard and beginning to be poorer than I'd ever been by supporting two people instead of one.
Three years ago: I discovered by accident that my fiance had been lying to me for months. While I was asleep, he was out with another girl. He told me he was at work but the truth was that he'd quit and started sneaking around with a girl rom his other job. He continued to lie about all of it until I found proof and he couldn't lie. I started saving up to move out. I was about to sign up for my Master's program but put it on hold because I couldn't afford it.
Two years ago: I was getting ready to (finally) move out into my own place. I had rediscovered what it was like to have friends and people who cared. I was finally realizing that I was worth more than the life I was living. I signed up for my Master's program. I moved out in June.
One year ago: My beau and I sped up our plans to move in together. He moved in in May. I was being recognized at work and school as someone who was destined for bigger things. I was seeing my daughter more often and feeling like family whenever I did. I had made some great friends and actually had them over my apartment.
Today: I'm in the most beautiful apartment I've ever lived in. I'm a month away from getting my Master's. My beau and are still blissfully happy. My daughter wants to spend more and more time with me. I'm exercising and getting healthy. I'm a leader at work- for my team, for the math program, for hiring new employees. Administrators come to me for my opinion and my help. My best friend comes by regularly to play games. I have a new and wonderful extended family courtesy of my beau.
My life is settling down quite nicely.